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Friday, February 22, 2008

Let the Hair Pulling Begin

Chinese Laundry
Photo by myself on University Place.


Today marks the start of World War III.

This morning, Frank, an architect at my office, had a skirmish with some decorators over the conference room. The decorators had booked the room but somehow, their appointment wasn't recorded in the log book. Frank was mid-meeting in the room when a group of them swung by, surprised and insulted.

Words were exchanged and suddenly it felt like 'West Side Story', with the Jets meeting the Sharks. The flamboyant expressive decorators were riled up in a huff and we, the stolid sensible architects didn't stand a chance.

Usually, we folks get along like monkeys and giraffes in the zoo (it's questionable, however, who are the monkeys and who are the giraffes). Our personality types are on opposite ends of the spectrum - the architects draw lines on computers, abstract representations of physical spaces. Meanwhile, the decorators use itty bitty swatches of material and paint chips to describe the same spaces.

They run around chattering giddily and calling one another 'Girl' and 'Lovey', regardless of gender. We call each other by our last names and sit quietly at our desks. They dress in stylish, color-coordinating ensembles and astonishing footwear. We dress tastefully in conservative greys, browns, blacks and the occasional green. They're the disco queens. We're the nerds.

Anyway, while Frank told me what happened with the conference room, we received a group email from a teammate showing the following: multiple portraits of a cartoon character sitting calmly, before spontaneously spazzing out. Above the cartoons, the email read 'Do someone a favor. February is National Mental Health Month. Send an email to an unstable person you know.'

'Why don't you forward Them that email we just got?' I suggested.

Frank giggled maniacally and started typing on the subject line, 'Ladies, don't cry.'

'Are you trying to start a war?' I asked. 'That's like lobbing the first grenade.'

Sensibly, Frank used the backspace key. He thought a bit before typing, 'Can't we all just get along?' and hit return.

Minutes later he received the reply, 'Not on your life, suckass.'

The first grenade had been lobbed from their side. The war was on.

For more posts on the divafest, click here, here and here


Ha Ha Sound said...

Wow. I think if I used the word "suckass", I'd get fired. That's a really cool story. Let your readers (or just me or whatever) know how this turns out.

Olivier said...

On est en plein dans le monde du cinéma : "West Side Story" contre "Star War". Personnellement je préfère "West Side Story". Merci pour cet instantané de ta vie ;o)
They are in full in the world of the cinema: " West Side Story " vs "star War". Personally I prefer "West Side Story". Thank you for this instantaneous of your life; o)

sid said...

LOL! I loved this story. I worked in a architectural firm once. I worked as a recpetionist for my uncle. Just to earn extra cash during the vacation. Anyway, I really hated it there. It was so quiet and it gave me the impression that life as an adult was boring. You have no idea how that experience of the working world scared the shit out of me. I never wanted to grow up.

Anonymous said...

Funny. I enjoyed reading it.

Kitty said...

haha, there is never a dull moment at my office. I'll be sad to leave in a couple weeks for another job. I'll have to post some older stories!

Olivier, yes, they are divas. And a fun bunch.

Sid, cool that you worked at an architectural firm. Yeah, I can imagine it could get very boring at the desk. It's a lot of furious, focused work.

greetings, Lincoln! glad you liked it!

Anonymous said...

You should swap outfits for the day. Might be fun?

We gets lots of funky footwear here - I dare not ever turn up to work unless I have something suitable on my feet. It's the first thing the students notice - shoes or funky tights.

Enjoy your last few weeks.

Jenn said...

When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way!

I wish I had come away with stories like this when I left my old job. Very funny stuff...

fishwithoutbicycle said...

That's funny Kitty, I have such an image in my head, swatches flying all over the place.

Anonymous said...

A much needed laugh. Thanks Kitty. Loved the post and as usual excellent photograph.
"the decorators use itty bitty swatches of material and paint chips to describe the same spaces." Love it :-)

Kitty said...

thanky RB and Jenn and Fish and JD...

The decorators, they are a different breed altogether. I love them, I'm perplexed by them, I'm entertained and infuriated.

They make the day full. I will miss them terribly.

Tammy said...

I think that would be so funny to watch...not to be involved in, but to watch. I have an award for you! :o)

Spandrel Studios said...

So will your new job mean you won't deal with decorators any longer? Or just a different mix of divas?

Hope your new coworkers are just as entertaining!

Kitty said...

Hey Tammy!
hehe, it's all fun in the end, even the semi-serious stuff.
Thanks for the award, doll!

Spandrel - well, I'll be dealing with decorators but not in the same office. I will miss these people dearly.